We are only as imprisoned as we allow ourselves to be. Most of the walls and cages in our life only exist within the confines of our mind. They come in all shapes and sizes.
“Ugly/Fat/Colored/Mentally ill/Disabled/etc… people can’t do things like that.”
“What will people think of me?”
“I was taught it is wrong to…”
“My parents/friends/partner/etc will be so ashamed if I…”
“My partner will (only/no longer) love me if I…”
“I have to keep in mind my family/partner/friends/etc so I can’t…”
“My religion teaches that it is bad to…”
“I feel it is morally wrong to…”
“I care about …. so I won’t do …”
“Only (insert slur of choice) act like that so…”
….
I could go on. The list of barriers and boundaries we put on our own life is endless. The thing all these have in common though is that they are all illusory. Unless there is a legal, financial or physical constraint to your actions (by example, murder is against the law, if you’re broke you can’t go on a trip to Hawaii just like that, and a paraplegic physically can’t run a marathon), nothing is actually keeping you from what you want. The walls and cages are all in your mind; you live imprisoned by the ideas and opinions of other people.
Before you tell yourself you can’t do something… stop and ask yourself why. And if all the reasons you come up with have to do with others than yourself… you need only three words to break free and get what you really want.
I.
Don’t.
Care.
That easy. All you really need to do is care more about yourself than about others.
It’s that easy, but of course it’s easier said than done. We live in a society where interpersonal dependance is constantly encouraged. We are taught to care about what people think of our looks, behavior, achievements… almost from the moment our mother pushes us out! Being completely free from that might always be a distant dream. Yet still. If we consciously realize that nothing is really holding us back except for us… we will reach and do far more than if we unconsciously let our entire life be ruled by other people’s opinions.
Fun fact. Did you know that while you are worrying about what everyone thinks of you, everyone is far too busy worrying what everyone else thinks of them to think anything of you?