QP Says Thanks

I live in Belgium, and in Belgium, Thanksgiving is not a real holiday. Therefor, no “Happy Thanksgiving” in the title. But I don’t think anyone should ever pass up on a chance to say thanks, whether that is in combination with turkey dinners and family meetings or not. There is a lot I have to say thanks for.

Thank you Experiment No. 7, for making me see that even a person like myself can have an honest relationship with someone. Yes, I am a bitch, I am deranged and sick and psychotic and many things more. You made me focus on that “more”. Thank you for being there even when I don’t want you to be there. Inside I do want it, you see.

Thank you Demon Authority. You have been by my side for all my life, from the moment you pushed me into the world without anesthesia, to this very day. I curse you a lot, because you are brutally honest and non-accepting of weakness, prejudiced and moralizing, and so much stronger than I will ever be. Yet I thank you. You are the one who shaped me, and if I can love despite my dysfunction that is your work. I have hurt you and you hate me with reason, and yet you love me still. Thank you for that.

Thank you Riemann Hypothesis, my friend and supporter and evil inner voice, for so many things. For talking to me when I’m lonely. For taking the punishments. For saving my ass when I got myself in too deep again. I thank you from the bottom of my delusional soul.  I don’t care if you’re but a symptom of my illness, to me you’re so much more.

Thank you Life. Thank you for the new chances you give me after all seemed lost. Thank you for making me see that there is more than one way. Thank you for the simple fact that for every dream you broke and took from me you have given me a piece of knowledge about myself. I may not like it, but at least I know it now.

Thank you Followers and Friends. I don’t know your names, often I don’t even know your faces, and still you are there. An invisible force that is sometimes the only thing that drives me to hang on. I am an attention whore and a crazy-ass woman, and your comments no matter how small make my day. To know that a person thought of me, if just for one second only, is a world of difference to me.

To all I didn’t name here, all the unknowns in my equation, the nameless faces on the bus, the politicians and the artists, the demagogues and the idealists, the television cooks and cat ladies of this world… I thank you. I thank you for being as you are. Sad, happy, sick, healthy, it doesn’t matter. Yes, I am a bitch and I’m proud of it, and yes I will attack you and I don’t play nice. But still I thank you. As Hugo Cabret said: This world is like a machine, and the people are its parts. There are no spare parts. Everyone has a function, somehow. Be who you are meant to be.

Thanks, QP

About quantumphysica

My name is QuantumPhysica The Insane, but you can call me QP. I am insane, admitted to a mental hospital in Belgium, and waiting for a decent diagnosis at the moment. Once I was a physics student with goals in life and what more; now I'm simply the patient of Room 93. Ever wondered what life is like in the psychiatric ward? I'll tell you everything you ever wanted to know... I am... particularly twitchy of personality. But I also am genuinely interested in everything. There is nothing that doesn't interest me, really. Everything, from quantum computers to fashion and cars to traveling... I also give advice. On anything. No taboos whatsoever. And I make lists of things...
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