In Memoriam: Das Machin (My Calculator)

So yes, I am doing an in memoriam post for an object. A calculator. My calculator to be precise. A slightly battered TI-84 with my name engraved in the back. Das Machin, as I nicknamed him. Today I have said goodbye to what has been my faithful companion in the best years of my life. Not because he was broken, no. Because my parents said I didn’t need it anymore I had to give it to my sister. To me this is the definite end of an era, the final blow to what has been the most wonderful period in my -admittedly short- lifetime.

Das Machin has seen more than just the classroom. I took it with me everywhere, in my purse, in my handbag, even in my pocket if necessary. I was attached to it, it gave me a sense of security to have such calculating power at hand in every situation. You see, I have a head for patterns, but I’m not one to do the math just like that. I figured that I knew the mathematical solution to most problems, but I would need some help in counting them out. I even took Das Machin with me to the madhouse. In all my psychotic de-realizedness I still managed to take that with me, go figure.

I don’t think there is a way to say all this without sounding terribly corny and obsessed, but since this is an In Memoriam I think I can get away with it. Even though it is dangerous for me to do physics or math again, even though I admittedly neglected Das Machin a bit (no math means no calculating), I will miss him. I will miss the soothing presence of that block of circuitry in my handbag. I am on my own now. All problems are now for me alone to count out.

In a way I am glad that Das Machin has found a second home, that he will be used again as he is supposed to… And in another way it saddens me. Das Machin was the most expensive thing I owned for four years. My name is engraved in his plastic. His graphs and tables have sometimes given me the insight I needed to solve crucial problems. In short, we have history. To my sister, who will be using him from now on, he will be an “it”, a mere piece of equipment. To me, he was a friend. No matter how bizarre that sounds.

So, this is goodbye. Even though the calculator’s circuitry isn’t broken, Das Machin as I knew him has left me for good. Here’s to him; thank you for helping to make those four years the fucking best years of a lifetime. I will never forget you.


Das Machin, my faithful calculator

About quantumphysica

My name is QuantumPhysica The Insane, but you can call me QP. I am insane, admitted to a mental hospital in Belgium, and waiting for a decent diagnosis at the moment. Once I was a physics student with goals in life and what more; now I'm simply the patient of Room 93. Ever wondered what life is like in the psychiatric ward? I'll tell you everything you ever wanted to know... I am... particularly twitchy of personality. But I also am genuinely interested in everything. There is nothing that doesn't interest me, really. Everything, from quantum computers to fashion and cars to traveling... I also give advice. On anything. No taboos whatsoever. And I make lists of things...
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1 Response to In Memoriam: Das Machin (My Calculator)

  1. tteclod says:

    Mine is an HP 50G. You may pry it out of my cold, dead fingers if you dare.

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